Why is it that we find it so difficult to share our feelings of love openly? I’m not someone to hide how she feels, nor am I successful when trying. And yet, there’s some kind of natural filter we have allowed to take over when it comes to being vulnerable enough to share intimate truths. This feels to be true both in interactions/conversation with others as well as when feeling my connection to the Divine.
I’ll begin there–my relationship to the Divine. The raw, pure, deep love I feel in this regard sometimes feels awkward to speak of openly. To say how much I love God, to allow anyone else a glimpse into that sacred space feels so very vulnerable and unsafe. There’s an added sense of ‘she’s crazy’ that seems to be woven into the truth of it, stepping in at times to quiet my thoughts and words. I’ve felt embarrassed to let anyone know the depth of adoration, passion and devotion I feel for the sacred. This untethering of my deep truth has been very much a part of what 2012 has brought to the forefront of my inner life. I’m not sure we’re supposed to keep it secret, to allow it out only when we feel safe and are alone with ourselves. I’m also not sure it’s meant to be paraded as a label of who we are. But what feels a bit more certain is that it’s real, and we are being called to be and live authentically. Part of who we are as Divine beings IS Divine–so to allow our souls to love the sacred so deeply and purely is infused into our being, it is indeed our purpose.
We’ve somehow forgotten along the way. Locked a part of ourselves in the closet, tucked away safe from the harm experienced by our ancestors–and by ourselves if you believe in past lives. However it came to be, we are still carrying those fears and wounds in our DNA and I believe we are in a time of healing and releasing them–for ourselves as well as those who came before and will follow after us. We are letting go of old ways of being. The buried pains we’ve carried for too long rise to the surface to be seen in the light of day, which in itself allows for them to heal and become whole.
This trickles on down to our connection with others, those whom we love dearly as well as those whom we ‘just meet’ each day as we go about our lives. Oprah’s ‘Super Soul Sunday’ recently featured a conversation with Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh in which he shared four affirmations for us to live mindfully in our relationships:
1. Darling, I am here for you.
2. Darling, I know you are there for me.
3. Darling, I know you are suffering and that is why I’m here for you.
4. Darling, I suffer. I try my best to practice. Please help me.
Say them aloud to yourself, imagine yourself sharing these affirmations with the ones you love in moments they are most needed, as you look into one another’s eyes. Feel the depth of presence you are offering. Can you imagine yourself having the courage and humility to say these words?
I’ve tried….and although I can say them in my mind, I haven’t yet been able to use the one that feels most prevalent thus far. Number 4. It’s a statement of feeling hurt or struggle, and letting your walls down enough to allow your loved one to be there for you and SEE that you hurt. Oh, the pride that so wants to hold on! But even while I’ve been unable to say the words to that other person, I was blessed enough to feel the impact of someone else saying them to me. My brother sees right through the stubbornness and hurt feelings, and in the midst of our conversation said to me ‘darling, I am here for you.’ I can tell you, my friends, there is much power in those words to melt even the hardest wall of protection. The frustration, the pride and defense all crumble in the midst of true Presence, compassion and love.
When we dare to love out loud, we change the world. We let go of the years of programming we’ve taken on as part of our own ‘well-being’ and instead begin to lean on the Divine to carry us through. We SURRENDER. And so it continues, this seemingly subtle but powerfully healing energy of 2012: Surrender. Let yourself go, move through the fears and hurts and dare to be authentic in the midst of it all. Remember that ‘No Comfort Zone Challenge’ we began in 2012? She continues her work, beneath the layers, behind the scenes, she carries us through our own sabotage and into the sacred.
My challenge to you is this: Dare. Dare to love out loud in whatever way your heart whispers to you.