The Innermost Chamber

~ Prayer of the Soul ~ 

We are so far from esteeming highly enough

our soul in which God (the Divine) so delights.

Each of us possesses a soul,

but we do not realize its value

as made in the image of God;

therefore we fail to understand

the great secrets it contains.

If we reflect, we shall see that our soul

is a paradise in which

God takes delight.

*

Let us think of our soul

as resembling a castle

formed of a single diamond,

or a very transparent crystal

containing many rooms,

of which some are above,

some below, others at the side.

In the center,

in the very midst of them all

is the principal chamber,

in which God and our soul

hold their most secreat intercourse.

What do you imagine

that dwelling to be,

in which a king, so mighty, so wise, and so pure–

containing all good–

can come to rest?

*

Nothing can be compared to

the great beauty and capabilities of our soul.

However keen our intellects be,

we are no more able

to comprehend the depths of our soul

than we are able to comprehend God,

for our soul has been created

in the image and likeness of God.

It is our soul’s likeness to God

that makes it possible for us

to commune with the God in whose image

we have been made.

*

~ St. Teresa of Avila

 

 

Advertisements

Energy of the Goddess

We all do it. Enthusiastic about a new project or shift in our life, we go full speed ahead, reveling in every beautiful moment of creation and birthing what has grown within us. Only to realize suddenly that the drive, the enthusiasm, the excitement have run their course, and it’s time to step back and quiet our inner self once again.

Here is the space in which I find myself. So much has occurred in a short period of time, opening my self to new energies, new opportunities and ways of experiencing life and myself. I’ve followed the steps along the way and moved with the drive of the masculine energy we all carry. And now…it is the call of the Goddess that comes.

She is soft and warm, welcoming and honoring the spirit within. There is a beckoning to go more deeply within and hear the stillness breathing with the beat of my own heart. So much has been accomplished, changes have been made, spaces of letting go and allowing new life to enter. And now, the silence has come to call.

It’s the castle of our souls we long to enter. The space of sacred presence that is mingled with Divine love, healing and purpose of our being. Here we encounter both the light and shadow of ourselves, the fears and gifts alike. Here we sit in the company of the Divine, soaking in the radiance of purity so brilliant it blinds the naked eye.

We ache for this experience, to be in this place, the sanctuary of our souls. It plays out as a desire to be full, loved, fed, warmed in our physical life. And yet at the depths of our being is the truth: we literally LONG for the Divine to fill us up. Instinctively we seek out a space in which to feel ‘enough’ and connect to the passion of our spirit. And from deep within ourselves, the need to share communion with the sacred is the force that overrides all other thoughts and desires.

Listen my friends. Be still long enough to feel it, to hear it–the energy of the Goddess. She waits for you, opening herself to surround you with grace. She is calling to your soul…..you’ll hear her voice….in the whispers of your heart……

Beneath the Emotion

Continuing on from yesterday’s post…

Allowing the emotional flow to breathe and move through my consciousness, there’s a deep well of truth to be learned about myself and my patterns.  Sometimes I forget to love, and indeed get too busy to let myself FEEL how much and how passionately I love.  Even now, I can feel so fully within myself the pure essence of love, and yet, with it comes a bit of guilt that I didn’t show it more while I had the opportunity.  And this is part of what I’m learning about myself–how much guilt I have, take on, create inside.  Then the guilt becomes part of the wall that is unconsciously being built between me and the energy of loving.  It’s beginning to feel a bit complex, isn’t it?  I understand completely.  Somehow, writing it helps to unwind all the twists, turns and knots created by the chaos of my own mind and unhealthy patterns.

If I keep myself in the space of the guilty feelings, I lose the connection to the love that is already filling the “cracks.”  Instead, it becomes a robotic way of thinking:  “I should have, why didn’t I, wish I….”  A deep pool of emptiness from which there is no rescue. 

I’m not choosing to swim in that water.  By becoming an observer to the way my subconscious self is handling the pain of loss, the cracks in my heart and the grief that follows, I’m realizing where I have blindly just moved around my own heartaches rather than through them.  Not this time.  I’m standing right in the middle of it, opening my arms, my heart and my soul to receive the healing that comes through the light filling my emptiness. 

The next piece I’m realizing is my own propensity to begin caring for others in order to not have to feel the sadness.  If I can just take care of them, make sure THEY are ok and have everything they need….then somehow in my twisted monkey mind, I’LL be ok too.  It’s a vicious cycle, a drug of its own.  My addictive habit I’m realizing, although I thought I had kicked it a few years back when I stopped putting myself in the position of always being busy taking care of what I perceived others needed.  I consciously made the effort to take care of ME.  And this my friends, is how our patterns work.  This is how we move through our journey in that cyclical process.  What we feel we have “mastered,” learned or overcome only comes back into our lives through a different route.  Indeed, we have grown through the same “addiction” in another place, through another lens, but then we return to the same truth of ourselves, with new players, a new stage and fresh, vibrant storylines.  The beauty of the process is that with each return, we go a bit deeper in our healing, our self-awareness, our Divine being.

It’s all part of the journey, all forward motion (as forward as we can be while traveling a spherical path)–or perhaps inward motion is a better term, as we are moving deeper into the space of authenticity, where empowerment lives.  We go even deeper from there, to the castle of our soul.  I know for me, I’ll take whatever route needed to get THERE, for that is where I long to be, in the presence of GRACE, Divine love and in communion with Spirit/God.  If it’s through the cracks and harsh doses of self-awareness that I must go to find this place, in the center of myself, then I’m willing to take every step. 

There’s more to what I’m learning, but this is enough for today.  I’m grateful for this process.  I’m thankful for the opportunity to break, to heal, to love.  I’m honored to be here with each of you, who allow me to share the most precious whispers of my heart….xo