Prayer of Service

My eyes are closed–and my heart wide open.

With a soft and gentle spirit

I AM HERE.

Asking, imploring to know

What would you have me do?

I am yours–to serve, to love, to pray, to support.

Show me the way, for

I AM HERE.

My soul’s greatest desire is to love, to connect, to share

And bring together the many across this Planet

In harmony, love, joy and peace.

Love.

Laughter.

Life.

Available to all.

I AM HERE.

Quiet mind, open heart.

As the waves wash over the shore,

Let Love sweep over me–through me.

Let her tenderness penetrate my every cell, expanding through all of my being.

Let the fire of her Grace warm my very soul.

Let her tendrils wrap around my body in its entirety.

I AM HERE.

Quiet mind, open heart.

As the bird sings his song,

Let my voice be freed.

Let its melodic tone be played aloud.

Let the lyric of my inner truth be heard.

Let the singing of my own heartsong bring joy to others.

Let the utterance of peaceful bliss inspire a Spirit of Unity.

I AM HERE.

Feeling.  Loving.  Seeing.

My eyes are opened within–the veil drawn back.

I see me.  Beautiful, glowing, radiant Being of Light.

I am the essence of Love and Grace.

I am a reflection of Divine Presence.

I AM–enough.  Perfect.  ME.

I AM HERE.

Alive.  Out loud.

In connection with all of Life.

Listening.  Choosing.  Creating.

I AM HERE!

 

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On Being a “Good Girl”

At a quiet moment in my day yesterday, I had one of those AHA! moments.  The kind where something that has always been part of your life changes its meaning and form, a light bulb goes off and you become enlightened to a rich awareness.

We all have the dialogue that goes on in the “back” of our thoughts.  That voice that can be our mother, our judge or another archetypal presence.  In this particular instance, it was that “mother” voice within my own consciousness that came to the stage.  I heard her say “that’s right, good girl” in support of what I was doing.  And in that exact moment….the switch flipped!

I really could feel the energy within myself change.  We’ve all experienced these moments, and really, they’re quite stunning are they not?!  In my younger years, I soaked it up every time my mom said out loud or even hinted at me being a “good girl.”  This meant I was loved, and as many of us do I took on that to be a “good girl” – to be loved – I had to be pleasing in my actions and my words.  A rigorous code of conduct began to weave itself within my subconscious, driving me to always be pleasing to others in order to be liked or loved.

But here’s the AHA! moment, my friends.  The entirety of my being realized in the space of a nano-second – this is not true!  The goodness of my “good girl” is love, kindness, joy.  That was what my mom could feel.  THAT was why she said “good girl” to me, filled with loving sentiment.  I didn’t have to get A’s, make sure my mom was happy, try to hide any perceived flaws or mistakes.  I just was me….and that was enough!  I was a “good girl” and indeed am a “good girl” just because I am Jackie.  Just because I love to love, respect people where they are, offer kindness and caring.  And even in the times when I struggle to find this place in myself, the good does not go away.  I don’t have to earn my goodness….it just is!

What a liberating, exhilarating and incredibly uplifting realization!  This changes the whole order of your existence, an AHA! such as this!

You too are GOOD.  Not because you have to be, but because you are.  I love the first line in Mary Oliver’s poem WILD GEESE:  “you do not have to be good.”  What she conveys is you do not have to try to be good by human standards.  You are good in the eyes of the Universe.  Take a pause, and let that sink in.  You ARE good.

Your heart will tell you so.  When you pause….listen to its whispers and feel the goodness that is you.

Beautiful Synchronicity

I was thinking this morning about relationships and what is unseen.  It’s taken me several years and several “layers” to appreciate a beautiful synchronicity between my husband and me.  Mind you, the appearance of it is not quite so stunning.  It goes something like this:  I’m aggravated because he seems to be preoccupied and isn’t “present” in our interaction, whatever it may be.  My aggravation makes itself known by saying something directed at him like “what’s wrong with you?”  Or a sentence that begins with “you”….”you’re not present, you seem upset, you’re a little tense.”  And I SO want to put it on him.  That he seems a bit “off” and is responsible for my aggravation.

But really – it’s me who’s feeling something.  I’m not feeling loved or I’m feeling distant from him.  I’m the one who has the aggravation and for him it’s like an ambush when I say “you seem upset?”  Rather than share with him what I’m feeling, I feel aggravated, rejected – and put it on him.  It must be that he feels something unpleasant and creates a blip in our screen of love.  Whether he is preoccupied with another area of life may or may not be true.  But if I’m coming to him and immediately projecting my feelings onto him, I will never know the true answer.  And I rob us both of honest and intimate communication.

Jenny McCarthy said of her breakup with Jim Carey that she took out a piece of paper and wrote down all the “negative” things she felt he’d done or not done in their relationship.  She then went down the page and crossed out Jim and wrote “I.”  Whatever she believed he had made her feel was all her own doing.  I love Eleanor Roosevelt’s quote:  “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.”  My husband cannot make me feel unloved, unappreciated, unnoticed.  But I sure can.  I’m solely responsible for how I feel and how I see myself.  People and situations may come along that are upsetting, but then it’s up to me what I do with that experience.

And THAT is the beautiful synchronicity.  Just when I need to see myself clearly, appreciate my own value and know within who I am really am, I begin to feel my husband doesn’t.  This is God’s gift to us all.  We are paired in our lives with spouses, children, parents, siblings, co-workers, friends and loved ones with whom we share a contract to help one another grow and heal the places we are broken.

Truly, what I most need in those moments of aggravation is to listen to my own heart whispers.  For when I do, I understand the language of love that prompts me to cuddle up close and let love flow with my husband.  Even when I’m not feeling loved, I can always find within myself the desire to love.  It pulses with life and shines an exquisitely shimmering light.  I have only to pause long enough to listen….to see…..to feel.

This is my wish for you today.  Pause long enough to hear your own heart whispers of love.

“Show Your Hair”

The following is from The Book of Awakening, subtitled “Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have.”  Author Mark Nepo has written a very poignant short message for each of the 365 days of the year.  It’s part of my new year gift to myself to spend some time with each day’s wisdom, allowing it to implant itself into every cell of my body and enhance my connection to Spirit.  I promise you, as you resonate with the universal truth offered in these messages, you will deepen your interior life….and open your inner ears to the whispers of your heart.

January 5

Show Your Hair

My grandmother told me, “Never hide your green hair – they can see it anyway.”                 ~  Angeles Arrien

From the agonies of kindergarten, when we first were teased or made fun of in the midst of all our innocence, we have all struggled in one way or another with hiding what is obvious about us.

No one plans this.  It is not a conspiracy, but rather an inevitable and hurtful passage from knowing only ourselves to knowing the world.  The tragedy is that many of us never talk about it, or never get told that our “green hair” is beautiful, or that we don’t need to hide, no matter what anyone says on the way to lunch.  And so, we often conclude that to know the world we must hide ourselves.

Nothing could be farther from the truth.  It is an ancient, unspoken fact of being that blackmail is only possible if we believe that we have something to hide.  The inner corollary of this is that worthless feelings arise when we believe, however briefly, that who we are is not enough.

~ Sit quietly, with your eyes closed, and with each in-breath feel the fact that who you are is enough.

I believe not feeling “enough” is something we all experience many times in our lives.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  We are created as Divine beings, in the image of God.  Within our makeup is the ability to understand wisdom, seek out truth and use our free will to choose what works best for us.  There is nothing in our existence that is meant to be robotic or programmed.  When we take on the belief that we are not enough, we begin to press ourselves into the shape that is most acceptable rather than embrace our natural selves.

Let yourself go, wear your GREEN HAIR proudly!  For it is your green hair that defines you as YOU and culminates the uniqueness of who you are.  And my lovelies…..YOU ARE ENOUGH.  Allow yourself to feel this, to take it in.  As the meditation above suggests – breathe it IN.  When you think of it today, breathe in “I am enough.”

When you connect to the Divinity that is you…..your heart will whisper her love for you……

We Are the Change

Here we are!  It’s 2011 and we’ve made it!  Our world consciousness is shifting….and we are alive to be an active part of the movement.  How absolutely invigorating!  I urge you to see yourself clearly, with full open eyes.  Understand the importance you bring to this time in history, the value of your gifts and talents, the most perfect hologram of love….this being that is YOU.

I’m a firm believer in our spiritual “charts” (astrological) and “contracts” (archetypal).  We were active participants in designing each, determining what course was most conducive to our soul’s journey in this life.   Together with our Master, Teachers, Guides and Loved Ones, we looked into this time of history and chose to be right here, right now!  We orchestrated who we are, what we’ve brought and how we will navigate our way through seeing, knowing, loving ourselves and the world around us.  Doesn’t that reality send a spine-tingling awakening call to your spirit?!

The challenges and triumphs that move us along the highs and lows of our lives, these were meant to be a part of our Earth School.  What we experience here molds us into a perfectly imperfect spirit-human being who can affect change.  We EACH have a contribution to the consciousness on our planet.  The smallest thoughts of love and kindness, to ourselves or to others can make a difference.  Truly….we know this already, do we not?

I really love Gandhi’s quote:  “You must be the change you want to see in the world.”  Well, loved ones….we are the change.  YOU are the change.  Embrace the privilege to be so.  See this era in our Earth’s timeline for just what it is….a tremendous shift in spiritual and self awareness.  Feel within yourself the power of that, the beauty of being alive RIGHT NOW.  And then, take a moment to yourself and breathe deeply into your heart, feeling GRACE envelop you in her warmth.  She is ever with you, lighting your way as you take each step forward in your soul’s voyage here.

And in the presence of grace…..listen…..for your heart whispers to you words that only you can hear.